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Monday, September 3, 2012

A Hainesport Rube Goes to Vegas

    Like the Three Dog Night song says, "I seen things I ain't never seen before."  That pretty much sums up my Las Vegas experience.  Now, I don't live in a bubble.  I read the news and watch cable TV.  I even saw a few episodes of "Rehab: Party at the Hard Rock Hotel."  http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rehab:_Party_at_the_Hard_Rock_Hotel  It's different when it's right there in front of you.
     From the first day, we got to see and hear the partying.  Our room was next to the rooms of several couples.  They made happy noise until about 1:00 a.m.  The screaming fight started at 5:00 a.m.  It lasted for a couple of minutes and ended with, "Fine!  Fine!  That's just fine!!!"  We were glad to see them leave.   The next afternoon we saw a twenty-something swaggering through the casino wearing swim trunks and an unbelted hotel robe.  He had a vodka on the rocks in one hand and a fat cigar in the other.  Mike swears he saw a working girl early one morning.
     And speaking of girls, we went to MGM's Crazy Horse Paris to see the topless review.  Mike liked it for the obvious reasons.  I thought it was artistic as well as sensual.  And I wish my body looked like any one of those girls' bodies.

Rockettes Doing Their Toy Soldier Routine
I got this photo from Google Images.  Can't determine the original owner. 

Crazy Horse Girls Doing Their Toy Soldier Routine
Image from www.las-vegas-shoes-reviews.com 

     People come to Las Vegas to get married.  We saw a few sets of brides and grooms in full regalia on the casino floor.  I can't imagine rolling dice and playing penny slots to pass the time between the ceremony and the reception, but that's just me.
     Evidently some people come to Vegas to shoot machine guns.  We saw billboard toting trucks driving up and down The Strip, advertising the "sport."  These trucks were the Las Vegas version of the planes that drag banners at our beaches.

     I would have to say my real hayseed moment came when I walked into the ladies room and found TV screens at each sink.  After staring at the commercials on the screen, I took pictures, of course.

Installing TV's at the sink - no way to keep the line moving.

     The Three Dog Night song goes on to say, "Mama told me not to come.  That ain't the way to have fun."  Mama obviously didn't know what she was talking about.    

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