I was in Shop Rite the other day, screwing up my courage to ask the cashier for his bag of bags - the bag hanging by the register filled with all the plastic bags that customers cast off. I use these bags to pick up after Mardi. If I have extra bags, I put them in the dispenser at Long Bridge Park. I'm not a praying person, but as I waited for the right moment to make my request, the phrase give us this day our daily bags crossed my mind. What if dogs had their own Lord's Prayer, I thought.
It might go something like this:
ARFF!! Father in Doggie Heaven,
We'll come when they call our names.
We'll always come,
then sit on our bums,
at public parks, as we do in obedience school.
Give us this day our daily bags,
so owners can pick up our messes.
Forgive the messes that land on the carpet,
and lead us not into chewing temptation,
but deliver us from chasing the mailman.
For "dog" is "god" spelled backwards,
and that's a lot to live up to.
Chasing our tails as ever,
Amen.
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