Pretty Poncho

      My sister requested a poncho.  So many of the poncho patterns out there look like big granny squares folded into triangles.  I wanted to do something different.  This pattern is sized as Women's XL, but the size is adjustable by adding or removing stitches from the beginning chain or by reducing hook size.  Here she is modeling the creation.

I made the poncho very long.  Some people prefer a shorter poncho.

The stitch is sort of a shell.  The poncho can be worn as a rectangle, the front edge going straight across, or as a triangle with the point centered in the front. 

     Here's the tutorial:

Pandemic Toilet Paper Shortages

      I didn't suffer during the early pandemic toilet paper shortages because I'm a paper products hoarder.  Whenever the giant, economy size package of TP or paper towels goes on sale, I buy it, whether I need it or not, and stack it up in the attic.  We're eight months into this Covid mess, and I still have two big packages of Scott Comfort Plus.  One of these days, I'm going to pull out the last roll.  I'm fairly certain that the toilet paper I will purchase at that point will not be on sale.

     While I find paying full price for something you use once and flush down the loo a little uncomfortable, I'm smart enough to realize that the occasional paper shortage does not justify the cost of installing  a bidet - not to mention that a bidet would not enhance the resale value of a home in Hainesport, NJ.  

     The other day, I was on my way to the garage with a pile of leftover fabric that I planned to use for rags, and I had an idea.  Why not cut up those rags and use them to wipe?  I figured I would toss them out after one use.  Then I saw this:  

         

  

     I decided that one can carry frugal a bit too far.  I'm certainly not going to sew toilet paper substitutes, and I'm not washing and drying them for reuse.  Why should I cut up that fabric?  Things haven't gotten that bad yet.  I will cheerfully pay the market price for my next case of bog roll.  

More Crochet - Shawls

       I've gotten carried away with shawls.  There are lots of patterns out there for pocket shawls.  This one though, is a Beverly Original.  The crossed double crochet stitch adds nice texture.  My sister thinks this shawl is just what she needs for running outside during cool mornings or evenings.  Sorry the picture is blurry.      

     This shawl is done in the virus stitch, so called because the shells multiply like a virus.  It is also known as the German shells stitch.  The simple picot edge finishes it off nicely.  You can find numerous virus stitch tutorials on YouTube.  

     This mesh shawl isn't for warmth.  It's for looks.  The YouTube tutorial is below the picture.  It's in Spanish, but that's not a big deal.  This shawl is really easy, so just adjust the video speed to .5 and follow along.  If you are distracted by the audio, hit the mute button.  The tutorial suggests adding tassels, but I left those off.       

Chal a crochet en punto red

(Crochet Shawl in Net Stitch)

Ant or Wasp?

     The latest new visitors in my back yard were (and I say "were" because all three of them are quite dead now) red, fuzzy insects, about 1/2 long, that were crawling through the grass at a pretty good clip.  I had never seen anything like them.  They sort of looked like huge ants, but I had never seen a bright red, fuzzy ant.  They could have been wasps, but they didn't have wings.  The first order of business was to annihilate them.  The next was to identify them.

     

     Say hello to Dasymutills occidentalis.  These bugs are commonly called red velvet ants or cow killer ants.  But they aren't ants.  They are a species of wasp.  The females are wingless and they pack an extremely painful sting.  The males have wings, but they don't have stingers.  Both females and males make a squeaking noise which they use to warn predators.  The three wasps that I repeated stomped didn't make a sound.

     Here's a bit more information from Wikipedia:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dasymutilla_occidentalis  

Do It Myself

     Thanks to YouTube, I'm calling myself a trained electrician.  Oh, all right.  I'm just an apprentice.  Oh, all right.  I removed and replaced a couple of exterior light fixtures.  That might seem insignificant to most do-it-yourselfers, but it's a big deal to me because I am afraid of electricity.  I still have awesome respect for 120V, 60 Hz alternating current, but after today's successful experience, I no longer cling to my unreasonable fear.
     I didn't take pictures during the repair because I had enough to do with staying balanced on the ladder and hanging onto the fixtures while I untwisted and re-twisted small parts and tried to keep from dropping my tools.
     It all started this past February when I noticed that one garage light was out.  A simple bulb change, I thought.  It turns out that the socket was broken.  It spun around and around, and I couldn't get the bulb out.  It was too cold to be outside fartin' around with light fixtures.  My phobia told me that I would burn the house down if I operated the garage lights, so I have not flipped the switch for four months.
     Four months of googling told me that sockets in fixtures can be replaced sometimes.  I decided that I wouldn't take that route.  Googling (and trips to Lowe's) also told me that most light fixtures are ugly, old things.  The one hanging from the siding for the last eleven years suited me better than anything more up-to-date.  When I found identical fixtures on the Home Depot website, I couldn't put off this repair any longer.  I ordered two new fixtures, knowing that the remaining original fixture would fail if I got cocky and replaced just the faulty one.

Here's how you change out fixtures:

1. Turn off the electricity.  I took a chance on flipping the breaker marked, "Front Porch/Foyer," and found that the circuit also included the front, exterior garage lights.  Off to a good start.

2.  Gather your tools - pliers, screw drivers, electrical tape, and caulk.  A small wrench for taking the exterior, decorative nuts off and on is easier than using pliers.   

3.  Unscrew the nuts on the outside of the fixture and pull it away from the wall.  In a perfect world, you can get your ladder up close enough to sit the fixture on the top of the ladder.  It's like having an extra set of hands.  Today, I had this perfect positioning.

4.  Pull the wiring out of the electrical box and unscrew the wire nuts (call them marettes if you really want to impress other amateurs).  At this point, I found loads of spider webs in the box, so I got an old paint brush and brushed out all the debris.  Take note of the wires.  The black wire carries the electricity to the fixture and is known as the hot wire.  The white wire is a neutral wire.  The bare wire is the ground wire which carries electricity back to the panel, then outside to a rod buried in the ground.  Sometimes a ground wire has green plastic insulation.  After taking apart all the connections, set your old fixture aside.

5.  Unscrew the nasty, old mounting bracket and replace it with the new bracket that you get with the new fixture.  Remember to level the bracket so your new fixture is level.  Now, set your new fixture on the top of the ladder.

6.  Re-attach the wires coming from the box to the matching wire coming from the new fixture - black to black, white to white, ground to ground.  I don't know if the order of attachment matters.  The instructions that came with my fixture said to attach the black wires first, so that is what I did.  You line up the black wires with their bare wire ends even, pop on a wire nut and twist it up tight.  Also, wrap electrical tape around the wire nut and wire ends.  This keeps out moisture and secures the join.  Next, I attached the white wires.   Last, I attached the copper ground wires.  Ground wires are screwed down under ground screws within the box and on the mounting bracket.  You'll see these screws because they have blue heads.  Wrap the ground wire under the screw heads and tighten down the screws before joining with the wire nuts.  Push all the wires neatly into the box.

7.  Lift the new fixture, line up the holes in the front plate of the fixture, and slide it on to the two mounting screws that protrude forward from the mounting bracket.  The mounting screws should protrude 1/4 inch on the outside of the fixture.  If they protrude more than 1/4 inch, you'll have to adjust them.  Screw on the mounting nuts so that they tightly hold the fixture to the wall.  If the fixture is not nice and tight, you will have to remove the fixture as many times as it takes to get the mounting screws in just the right position to hold the fixture to the wall properly.  This is probably the most difficult part of this repair.

8.  Run a bead of 100% silicon outdoor caulk across the top and 2/3 of the way down each side of the fixture base.  That will keep water from getting inside in just about all circumstances.  If water does get inside or if moisture accumulates, leaving the bottom uncaulked allows for drainage or evaporation.

New light ... same as the old light.

Working Lights on Both Sides

   

Girl's Crochet Poncho

     Ponchos were all the rage in the late 1960s and early 1970s.  They made a comeback in the 2000s.  After struggling through the "Pay Attention Shawl," a poncho seemed like an easy project.

I found a few of these in the yarn stash.  I thought, My, that looks like an exotic bird.

Darn tootin', it did.  That designer at Bernat® must have been inspired by the Rainbow Lorikeet, a bird that lives in the Australian rain forest.

 

I'm sending this colorful creation to the girl who lives down the street.  A little birdie told me it was her birthday. 

Change Is Good

     I haven't had a haircut since February.  I looked like this back then:

     I was lovin' my gray hair and longer tresses. After almost four months of hair neglect, I was itching for a new look.  I bought a box of the world's lightest ash blonde and went back to coloring.  Today, I got an illegal haircut.